We thought people might be nervous about their first swinging experience and might be helpful to write about our first time.

Meeting the couple

We had met this couple for a social drink a week or so earlier, we had all chatted over a coffee for a while so we had got to know each other a little.

They are younger than us and of a different race and religion. This is not unusual in the lifestyle, at least for us. You get to meet people you wouldn’t normally meet, this is a plus for us.

We messaged them to say we would like to meet up with them for a playdate in the future.

After a few days of messaging, we agreed on a convenient date for us to meet together for our first playdate.

We also agreed that we would host the play date. At the time, we had a large apartment which was perfect for hosting a playdate. We were both soft swap couples so we clarified that with the other couple to avoid any misunderstanding on the night of the playdate.

Before the date

I n addition to being nervous about our first playdate, we also had to think about hosting. It was our first time hosting a playdate and we had to figure out what we needed to do.

After doing some research we made sure we had enough towels, snacks and water bottles (chilling in the fridge).

We had a number for a pizza delivery place just in case we were all hungry afterwards. That was the hosting part sorted, now we had to get ready ourselves.

As usual deciding what to wear was difficult as I wanted to wear something sexy but not slutty. In the end, I settled for some shorts and a T-Shirt.

I decided not to wear lingerie as it wasn’t a big thing for them.

So after showering and changing we excitedly and nervously awaited their arrival.

During the play date

O nce they arrived we had some drinks, the other couple don’t drink alcohol so we all had tea.

We don’t drink much alcohol before a play date as it impairs our judgement and behaviour. Besides, you want to remember your playdate afterwards. We’ve heard stories about swingers over drinking and throwing up on a playdate.

As usual, with swinger dates, the evening started off with chatting. Swinger couples don’t immediately take off all their clothes and start banging each other! After some sexy talk, mostly about swinger stuff, we were all in the mood for play.

An experienced swinger couple we know suggested the idea of showering with your swap partner. We now suggest this to new couples we play with. For this playdate, we all showered separately as we were a little nervous.

In the bedroom: Our first swinging experience

After this, we were all soon undressed and ready to play. We took our time as we were both inexperienced at swinging and still a little nervous.
We started by warming up with our own partners, this helped us get more in the mood.
Then we swapped partners for a while, this was the bit I really didn’t know how I would react to.

There is no kissing with swap partners with this couple so it was just fondling and kissing on the body and this eventually led to a lot of oral sex.

I looked over at hubby with the lady and expected to feel jealous but to my relief, I didn’t. We were all too busy having fun with our swap partner.

I was on the bed close to the other lady when I was asked about if I was bi-curious. It was easy enough to manoeuvre so both of us ladies could interact with each other.

She has a lovely full figure so it was very enjoyable. We were both receiving oral sex from the men at the time and both of us ladies came during this bit.

We took a quick break to drink some water and chatted for a while.

Then we started playing again with our own partners for a while and then swapped again like before.

After a while, we went back to our partners to finish the play date, a nice way to end the evening.

Lying on the bed

We then lay on the bed chatting for a while, that has become our favourite way to end a playdate.

We mainly talked about lifestyle subjects in general as we hadn’t processed it yet.
I also think we both wanted to discuss in depth with each other first.
We got up and got dressed and saw them out and into a taxi home once they said they had to go.

So that was our first swinging experience.

After the date

O nce we saw them out we settled on the bed with some wine and discussed the date, how we felt and what had happened to each of us during it.
It is hard to keep an eye on your partner when you are busy playing with your swap partner.

Both of us enjoyed our first playdate. The couple we had played with were nice so we wanted to see them again.

I felt a bit strange about what had happened but only in a “wow, that really happened” kind of way. The next morning when I woke up and saw nothing had changed all the strangeness went away.

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Lessons from our first playdate

B oth of us had fun on our first playdate.

Whatever feelings I had during or after the playdate go away after you realise nothing has changed.

Let your partner know if you need them. You can’t expect them to be aware what is happening to you all the time.

Jealousy was not going to be a big problem for us. It was a little weird at first watching our spouse have sex with someone else. It passes quickly though.

Finally, just go with the flow, and try not to have too many expectations.

We would love to hear from you

W e would love to hear about your first play date experiences.
Did you have any worries?
If so what worried you the most about it?
Did it go better/worse than expected?
Did you make any special preparations for it?